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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24115720">Comfort In the Form of Taylor Swift</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexa_Foxly/pseuds/Lexa_Foxly'>Lexa_Foxly</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, M/M, Max Lightwood Dies, Out of Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 01:42:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,976</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24115720</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexa_Foxly/pseuds/Lexa_Foxly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When Max Lightwood dies, All Simon can do is be there for his best friend, all he can do is help the man he fell in love with get through it...he just hopes he’s enough.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alexander Lightwood/Magnus Bane, Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood, Jace Lightwood/Simon Lewis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>55</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Comfort In the Form of Taylor Swift</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So I know this is by far my best work, Simon and Jace are out of character but this is a cute story I think...and I’m trying to ease back into writing...</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Focus Simon. Focus. You’re at work and you shouldn’t be having inappropriate thoughts- especially when said thoughts revolves around your boss’s brother. He had to repeat this mantra to himself a couple of times. While he finished up the dishes in the back he was painfully aware that Jace was just out front wiping down the tables. Alec had left, something about date night with his husband and Maia was off so it was just them for closing.</p>
<p>He cleaned the last dish, running his hands through his hair and then cursing. His hands where still soaked and now he had water dripping into his eyes. </p>
<p>“Tables are cleaned, cash register is locked up and lights are off-“ Jace’s voice coming into the kitchen snapped him back to reality and he stopped shaking his hair out like a dog, face flushed in embarrassment “wet-“ was all he managed to say and he knew his face got two shades darker.</p>
<p>Jace burst into laughter and okay, three shades darker. “You’re such a nerd,” he teased playfully “god Simon, you have no right being as cute as you are.” He grabbed a clean towel from the shelf and shuffled it over to him. Four shades darker, Jace just called him cute and he thought he would explode on the spot.</p>
<p>“Need a ride home?” Jace asked, expression hopeful? Or was he imagining that puppy dog look in his eyes? </p>
<p>Either way, he wasn’t about to turn down more time with Jace “Yeah, sounds great let me just lock the office.” </p>
<p>A piece of him wanted Jace to follow, to push him up against the wall and make him breathless. That was also the part of him that didn’t have any self control when it came to Jace Lightwood.</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Jace gave him rides all the time, that’s what friends do and while Jace probably saw it as that, Simon saw it as an opportunity to learn new things about him every time he got into the car. </p>
<p>Today, he was shocked with what he learned. And pleased. When Jace started the car, music blared from his speakers and the blondes face went red. </p>
<p>Simon’s insides twisted and he slapped at his hand when he went to eject the CD “Jace Lightwood,” he smirked playfully “where you listening to Taylor Swift on your way to work this morning?” </p>
<p>The look of shame on his face said it all and Simon couldn’t help but laugh. His face burned brighter and he whined “Simon stop laughing! It’s just music!” He planted his face in his hands “don’t tell Alec or Izzy- I’ll never hear the end of it-“ </p>
<p>His laughter got more uncontrollable and he was leaned over, struggling to take a breath in a matter of minutes. </p>
<p>What ceased his laughing was the punch Jace aimed at his bicep “ow!” He whined, pouting and rubbing his arm.</p>
<p>Jace smirked “I don’t regret it you ass,” he glanced at the radio, grin growing “and since I don’t have to hide it from you anymore.” He leaned forward, turning the music up and singing along so poorly that Simon couldn’t stop his next round of laughter. This time though, Jace joined him.</p>
<p>Pretty soon, they where both singing. Mocking each other for knowing the words and smiling so brightly that it started to hurt his cheeks a little bit. He loved car rides with Jace. </p>
<p>———</p>
<p>What he loved more then car rides with Jace was movie night with Jace. (And the rest of them but mainly Jace.) Or at least that was until Lydia Branwell happened. </p>
<p>Simon glanced around the room, Maryse and Robert where sitting on the couch together. No doubt worrying about their youngest son, who was again too sick for movie night. Izzy and Clary was taking up one arm chair and Alec and Magnus had the other. Simon would usually sit next to Jace in front of the coffee table, eventually he used Jace’s lap as a pillow when he inevitably started to fall asleep and the blonde would make him lay down. But today, he was sitting on the floor by the couch. He was trying to focus on the movie, really he was but it was hard to do that when Jace was a few feet away making out with a very pretty blonde girl. Why did he start coming to the Lightwood movie night in the first place?</p>
<p>He felt eyes on him and glanced to the side, aside from Jace and Lydia, everyone was looking at him. Concern was clear in Clary’s eyes and he felt like he couldn’t breath all of a sudden. Did they know how he felt?</p>
<p>Before he knew it and without much thought he shot to his feet and quickly left the house. Only once he was outside and heading towards his bike did he take in a deep breath. He knew he’d have to explain that one later but, at least he wasn’t in that situation anymore.</p>
<p>Had he stayed in the yard a second longer he would have realized Jace had immediately ran after him. Had he been In the room, he would have saw Jace nearly trip over Lydia to get to him. And while Simon didn’t notice it and Jace didn’t know why he’d been so desperate to comfort Simon. Lydia Branwell did.</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Simon didn’t know why he did it, sleeping with the first person he came across after that disastrous movie night had never been in his agenda. But he’d been upset and maybe he needed to let some steam off? He really didn’t know, it wasn’t like him but in that moment all he could think about was forgetting about Jace and Lydia.</p>
<p>So yeah, he’d taken Home a guy he’d met in the elevator and yeah, they where currently in a compromising situation on his kitchen counter. But he was still thinking about Jace. About his hands on her, about them being together while he stewed in his own anger and sadness. </p>
<p>He tried to take his mind off of him, instead turning his focus to the male he’d brought home. He arched off the counter, throwing his head back and trying desperately to focus on the pleasure and not the guilt. He moaned and dragged his hands over his arm. His shoulder blades digging painfully into his white countertop.</p>
<p>Of course the noises that they where making meant he didn’t hear a key in his lock, he didn’t hear the door open or close. But he did hear the sharp intake of breath behind them. And then suddenly his guest was slammed against the fridge and Simon had to scurry to grab his shirt from beside him to hide himself. For a second fear coursed through him, he’d never seen Jace this mad.</p>
<p>“Jace! What the hell?!” He tried to pull his best glare but Jace wasn’t focused on him. All of his anger was directed at Allen? Was that his name? Why couldn’t Simon remember.</p>
<p>His voice was low, a clear warning in his words “get your fucking cloths on and get out-“ he jabbed his finger in the direction of the door.</p>
<p>Aaron? snorted and rolled his eyes “fine, fine-“ he made to look at Simon but Jace stepped into his line of sight, a possessive growl emanated from him and holy shit that was hot. He blushed darker and buried his head in his hands.</p>
<p>When the front door closed, he felt Jace’s burning glare “can I get dressed before you yell?”</p>
<p>But surprisingly Jace didn’t yell, what he did was much much worse. He left. He didn’t say anything, he just...walked out.</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Is was safe to assume he was avoiding Jace, he called out sick to work three times in a row and he was sitting on his couch with a tub of Ben and Jerry ice cream. Wallowing in self pity. Love story by Taylor Swift playing in the background from his stereo and depressing him more.</p>
<p>He was ignoring every message and phone call. And he planned on ignoring the door until the knocking got more frenzied and panicked. And he knew that he couldn’t ignore that one. So he got up and trudged over to it, swinging it open and being ready to bring down a hammer of curse words that quickly died in his throat replaced by pure concern “Jace....” </p>
<p>He was a wreck, tears staining his cheeks and his eyes where red. Jace Lightwood didn’t cry. Something was seriously wrong and this definitely wasn’t because of what he did.</p>
<p>he sniffled pathetically and wiped at his eyes aggressively.</p>
<p>“What happened?” He had to fight the urge to pull him into a tight hug “Jace, what’s wrong?”</p>
<p>A whimper was his reply and Simons resolve broke. He wrapped his arms around him like lightening, pulling him into the tightest hug that he could. His hands running through his hair soothingly. </p>
<p>It was a long couple of minutes before Jace forced himself to speak. The words that he choked out tore Simon’s heart in half and he hugged him even tighter. </p>
<p>“Max died.”</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>He knew the youngest Lightwood was sick, cancer. But still, he hadn’t expected that. Jace had thankfully fell asleep about an hour ago, his head was resting on Simon’s Shoulder and he refused to move. If he could have stopped breathing he would have just to make sure he stayed asleep. Just to make sure he didn’t cry anymore that night. </p>
<p>Jace had completely broken down seconds after getting through the door and from how he understood it. Alec and Izzy where just as bad. Magnus had added him and Clary in a group chat to check on each other. His phone vibrated again and he carefully opened the text with his one free arm.</p>
<p>Alec’s Husband: “Finally got Alexander to sleep, how are Izzy and Jace?”</p>
<p>Clare Bear: “Izzy’s silent, no tears....no emotion...I don’t know what to do. She keeps staring off into space and I can’t get her to say more then a word...”</p>
<p>Alec’s Husband: “She’s coping in her own way dear...this is hard for all of us but they where all so close...just be there for her. Simon, how’s Jace?”</p>
<p>Simon: “Sleeping, restlessly- I’m not letting him out of my sight. I’ve never seen him cry like that- it broke me.”</p>
<p>He set his phone down, he pressed a kiss into Jace’s hair and found himself humming Love Story by Taylor Swift. They’d listened to it the other night Jace had admitted it was his favorite song by her...maybe it could offer the comfort he couldn’t. For the first time since he’d showed up, a small minute smile appeared on Jace’s face but it was gone as quickly as it had come. </p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Alec closed shop for a bit so that they could grieve which meant Jace stayed with Simon.  </p>
<p>And Simon took advantage, he made sure that Jace ate three meals a day- made sure he was comfortable. But it also meant he woke up to Jace, cuddles against him in a restless sleep that Simon was never going to break. And damn it if he couldn’t get use to studying the gorgeous man next to him every morning. Waiting for the right moment to get out of bed without waking him.</p>
<p>Today though, he just stayed. He carded his fingers through his hair and hummed more Taylor Swift songs, not that he knew a lot. Honestly he wished he knew a different band or singer that Jace liked.</p>
<p>It had already been a couple of weeks and the funeral was tomorrow, he knew Jace was dreading it. Hell, he was dreading it. There was a short knock on his door and he made a soft noise of protest before carefully crawling out of the bed, slipping shorts on over his boxers.</p>
<p>He was surprised to find Lydia at the door, a concerned look in her eye. He tried to fight down that anger he felt, she didn’t deserve it. “Miss. Branwell,” he tried softly but there was a bit of bitterness “can I help you?”</p>
<p>She laughed shortly and held out a bouquet of flowers “for Jace...” she hummed “I heard about Max...I just wanted him to know he has friends thinking about him....” </p>
<p>He didn’t know what to feel, he didn’t know what to grab onto. She’d said they where just friends but it also sounded like she’d implied he wasn’t Jace’s friend and that pissed him off. He decided to grab that one “he knows he has friends thinking about him,” he said sharply “otherwise he wouldn’t be sleeping in my bed in my apartment. Because I’m his friend and I’m always thinking about him-“</p>
<p>Lydia blushed brightly and he immediately felt guilty “I’m sorry I didn’t mean it that way....I delivered bouquets to Izzy and Alec too....” </p>
<p>He sighed and ran his hand over his face “no- no I’m sorry, it’s not like me to be hateful...it’s just...everything is a bit stressful right now...” he stepped out of the way “I’m making a lot of stupid decisions lately, please come in.”</p>
<p>She stepped into the apartment and offered him a warm smile “You have a very nice home...”</p>
<p>He sighed and nodded, thanking her as he made his way to the bedroom. Peeking in to check on Jace before carefully shutting the door so their voices didn’t wake him. “I wouldn’t have this place if not for Jace,” he said honestly “he haggled the rent price from 500 to 350...” he smiled at the memory and rubbed his neck “he’s always been super charming in that way.”</p>
<p>She set the flowers down and smiled at him “I never got to ask him how the talk went,” she hummed “but considering you two are here....I assume it went well.”</p>
<p>He was confused and didn’t bother to hide it “huh?” But she didn’t seem to notice his lack of knowing.</p>
<p>“It took ten minutes to convince him to come talk to you Friday...” she hummed and ran her finger over the TV stand. “He was terrified but love causes that sometimes...” she glanced at him with a warm smile “I’m glad to see he finally told you the truth.”</p>
<p>His heart might’ve stopped beating. Friday when he’d walked in on Simon and elevator guy- he was coming to what? From how she was speaking she made it sound like he was in...</p>
<p>She finally looked at him long enough to see it “oh! Oh my god he hasn’t told you yet and I just ruined it- I-I’m so sorry-“</p>
<p>He shook his head slowly “tell me what?” He asked seriously “Lydia- what- what was he going to tell me...?” </p>
<p>She shook her head in return and covered her mouth “Simon that’s not my place...”</p>
<p>He ran his hands through his hair and tugged “I did something bad-“ he said seriously “Friday- I slept with someone and Jace walked in- I need to know what I just fucked up-“</p>
<p>She sighed heavily “I’m sorry Simon I-“ before he could get an answer out of her, she grabbed her purse and booked it. </p>
<p>————</p>
<p>Jace woke up an hour later, he walked into the kitchen, syes searching and when he found what he was looking for he immediately walked over to Simon and wrapped his arms around his waist. Face buried in his shoulder. He was still in just boxers and a shirt. Simon wasn’t the least bit surprised about his sudden cuddle attack but Magnus and Alec where over so they maybe where a bit but not as much as they should have been. Which said something. </p>
<p>“Jace,” Alec sighed from his spot next to Magnus “Are are you?” Magnus reaches over to touch Alec’s hand, smiling sadly.</p>
<p>Alec, always trying to be the strong one. Jace just shrugged, not moving from his place in Simon’s neck. </p>
<p>Alec laughed weakly and took his husband’s hand. They sat in silence for a moment, just enjoying each other’s company.</p>
<p>And then It happened, he wasn’t paying attention to his actions, his focus was solely on Jace. He had his mouth resting against his head, running his hands through Jace’s hair. He hadn’t even realized that he’d started humming it until Magnus and Alec made matching noises of shock. </p>
<p>“Are you humming Taylor Swift?” Magnus asked in surprise, trying not to laugh. </p>
<p>Simon laughed softly and blushed “Sorry...it’s just a habit I guess.”</p>
<p>“Habit my ass,” Alec said playfully “Jace is obsessed with her and that’s his favorite song.”</p>
<p>“Wait-“ Jace had tensed and finally pulled back “how do you know that?”</p>
<p>“Max” he said simply and the air in the room went down again “he told me he heard you singing it when you took showers or you exercised...” </p>
<p>Jace buried his face in Simon’s neck again and all he could do was hold him.</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Jace was clingy, something he hadn’t ever been. But Simon didn’t mind, he knew the blonde needed this and he knew for some reason Jace attached too him for it. </p>
<p>Maryse Lightwood has taken her permanent spot beside the casket. Robert looked green In the face if he got even a little bit closer so he stayed in the back. Izzy and Alec where locked in a tight hug in the middle of the room, Clary and Magnus standing by for support.</p>
<p>“Are you okay?” Simon asked softly, leaning down to rub at Jace’s back. </p>
<p>He got a weak smile in reply “no,” he said honestly “but there’s nothing I can do about that right now....thank you for being here.”</p>
<p>Simon nodded and casually pressed a kiss against his cheek, blushing immediately after “You’re my best friend Jace, of course I’m going to be here with you...” </p>
<p>Jace made a face at that, a face that Simon didn’t particularly like but he said nothing. He shouldn’t have kissed his cheek...</p>
<p>———</p>
<p>Simon unlocked the door for them and pushed it open, that had been hard for them and he knew it, Jace was beyond exhausted. Emotionally and physically drained.</p>
<p>He went to flip the living room light on but Jace halted him, slipping his hands into Simon’s and pushing him against the nearest wall. </p>
<p>Simon was sure his world has imploded right then and there. He carefully locked eyes with him “Jace are you-“</p>
<p>Kissing? They where kissing and he was seeing stars. His body was moving on it’s okay now, some how his hands had found their way to his cheeks. Some how they’d gotten closer, hips pressed together. </p>
<p>This wasn’t right- he told himself. Jace was grieving, upset and trying to distract himself. He’d just buried his little brother. He wanted to punch him away but god it was hard. He’d wanted to kiss him for so long and now they where, they where locked in a passionate kiss. </p>
<p>Somewhere in the back of his mind he was trying to focus on the sound of Jace’s belt coming off, his following. But he was kissing the guy he’d been in love with for two and half years. </p>
<p>Grieving, Max. He kept telling himself make him stop, don’t let him make a decision he’ll regret. Only when he felt the hand that had slipped down his pants skim over him did his short circuiting mind click.</p>
<p>“Jace-“ he breathed sharply and gently pushed him back, a struggle to do. “Jace we can’t-“ He was aware of just how heavy he was breathing. Of how heavy Jace was breathing. “You just buried your little brother Jace....you don’t want this, you just want to forget...”</p>
<p>“I don’t-“ Jace was staring at him like he was confused “Simon-“ he started and then shook his head “I do want to forget, you’re right about that but- but that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve been head over heels for you for the last year and a half- and I wouldn’t regret sleeping with you- ever.” He reaches forward to squeeze his hand and all Simon could do was stare for a moment “okay but you have to prove it then,” he managed to force out “grieve first. Then come back to us...I want you to be a thousand percent sure because I don’t think I can handle loving you just for you to change your-“</p>
<p>Jace was suddenly on him again, hands on his hips and lips pressed together in a firm kiss. But this time at least, he made no move to take it further then what it was. </p>
<p>“I’ll hold off on the big stuff,” he said softly after a moment “for now...but you should know how I feel....how I’ve always felt.” What surprised him about the declaration was how Jace simply walked off after it to take a shower. And Simon’s brain cells had died the moment the first kiss happened. And then the second kiss had wiped out the town. If braincells lived in towns he assumed it had just exploded.</p>
<p>————A year and a half later</p>
<p>It had taken them a while to get to where they where but Simon wouldn’t have traded it for the world.</p>
<p>Simon found himself smirking at the blond currently hovering over him “Are we about to have sex?” He asked playfully “because while I’m up for it, the couch might not be the best place for it-“ </p>
<p>Jace laughed softly and pressed his face into his shoulder “that depends Nerd,” he hummed playfully “I have a question first. An important one...”</p>
<p>Simon felt the tension in Jace and immediately tensed himself “what’s wrong? Are you okay?”</p>
<p>The soft expression Jace had on confirmed that he was but it didn’t mean he wasn’t on the edge now. </p>
<p>Jace stood, pulling him to his feet and slipping both of his hands into Simon’s “three and a half years,” he said softly and suddenly Simon could see how nervous they where “that’s how long I’ve been in love with you...four and a half is how long I’ve known you...one and a half is how long I’ve been planning this...”</p>
<p>Simon was becoming uneasy, anxious “pretty extensive timeline you got there-“ Jace surprised him again, pressing a finger against his lips to silence him “Let me finish...”</p>
<p>“All that time with you and my feelings haven’t changed,” he said softly “I’ve never loved someone like I love you Simon- and there’s not a doubt in my mind that you’re the person I want to spend the rest of my life with-“</p>
<p>Simon felt his breath catch, suddenly this all made sense and then Jace was searching his pockets and dropping down on one knee. His phone was perched in his free hand and suddenly a song was coming from the speakers and he had to refrain himself from laughing in joy. </p>
<p>“Simon Lewis, please do me the honor of marrying me? Nothing in this world would make me happier.”</p>
<p>He focused on the song for a moment, a smile pulling at his lips. </p>
<p>“It's a love story baby just say "Yes" Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel...”</p>
<p>This song in no way described them but somehow of the course of time it had become theirs...</p>
<p>“This love is difficult, but it's real. Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess. It's a love story baby just say "Yes"”</p>
<p>“Yes,” Simon said softly. His heart beating out of his chest as he felt Jace slip the ring on his finger. A simple but beautiful silver band. Small diamond along the top.</p>
<p>Jace smiled brightly, standing and hooking his arms around his waist “yeah?” </p>
<p>Simon laughed softly and pressed his face into his shoulder “a thousand times yes.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So I’ve been through a lot the last couple of years and I’m just getting back into writing! I know it’s not great but thank you for reading never the less! </p>
<p>I love me some constructive Criticism!</p>
<p>Stay Sincere Loves!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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